When to start a family
Planning Ahead Before Starting a Family
the reality is I do think it is
important to plan yeah one if you are
financially struggling somebody got to
work both y'all got to work yeah so who
are gonna take care of the kids I got a
lot of the times in America people get
so fascinated with pregnancy they don't
really think about after baby like the
reality and that all the Jones is
addressed by your kids like $30 jeans my
point is to do the same thing with
weddings a lot of people just look at
the wedding they never really think
about marriage and about the work that
it takes you know to keep that marriage
going it's the same thing with having
kids so what I would do if you're not
financially stable I would just make
sure that you guys have serious
conversations yeah about the reality of
what's gonna happen when you have a baby
especially when you aren't really
financially stable daycare I mean is one
person gonna maybe pick up another job
and and or pick up two or three jobs and
we're switch on now on yes someone
during the day somebody watches them at
night yeah yeah but we talk about people
that's in a cup I want to talk to women
out there because a lot of women are get
in situations and that's why I always
stress to women to protect yourself yeah
it makes sure because of you know taking
care of that baby for yourself
yeah you you with somebody at least you
got somebody to play off of but in
reality especially in the times that we
live in most of the time is the woman
that has to take care of the kids and
it's like you really have to plant as a
single woman or a woman that you just
out on the town having a good time you
know make yourself responsible cuz you
get that kid you know you gotta take
care of it I feel sorry for my mom my
mom took care of me and my brother it
was hard in the project you know
sometimes I went hungry you know how
hard that is for her her child just the
chair and how does that exact how does
that affect you as a parent when you
have all of this stress on you of how am
I gonna make sure that I have a roof
over my head how am I gonna make sure
that my child doesn't go to bed hungry
it's
there to you long-term and it's unfair
to the unborn child it's also insane
that today in order for any of us to get
a credit card or to even purchase a
house you have to qualify and the system
has it figured out to see what kind of
stable job you have what history you
have in order to get you to even qualify
to get to those places in life but in
real life you can have a bit anybody can
have a baby because of an accident or
because of one happy night out or you're
not being responsible that's the part
where we have to take charge of
ourselves and be the qualification and
the standard that we need to set in
order for this human bringing we're
bringing up is it sound terrible to say
that I think being a parent is an honor
and that absolutely I you I think that
it shouldn't be thrown around where you
just say that's like somebody saying I
want to be an Academy Award winner I
want to be an Academy Award winner I'm
gonna I have to put in the work to get
there I love you really yeah I want to
be a parent but I don't have the money
can't buy diapers don't have a house but
I want to be a parent cuz it's my dream
it's my dream but there are studies and
responsibilities you have to take in
order to be that I wanna be the owner of
Tesla well guess what I didn't invent
that bomb model of a car the reality is
there are some people having kids as
accessories yes there's not oh they're
not really thinking about wait a minute
once you are a mother you are a mother
forever and you have to take
responsibility over there for that top
floor dad yeah the thing is for me that
when what I say is I also know families
who are so stressed out I was one of
those girls who also was more stressed
out about how much money do you have to
make because I grew up poor so I'm
afraid of young poor yeah so I
constantly think and hang over my home
most overworked because of that yes yeah
because I think that a lot there are
people that also wait to have a certain
amount so that they they qualify to have
to be a parent and there's no qualified
amount that you should have I think that
there just needs to be a plan correct
and there needs to be a surrounding of
health and safety always and not broke
well it goes by what your safety
intervener 8 what tam said you know have
have a steady job have something just
and it's okay to wait a year or two
before you want to have a start a family
of yourself let's get the question can
you take care of yourself you live with
your mama your daddy and artists you
know we can try that because some people
actually live with their parents and
they do that to say would you I don't
think it's fair to sit there and shot
your family while you living under
somebody else's roof culturally or
whatever then that's fine I'm just
saying don't come in here broke thinking
oh but I just want babies and you didn't
think the rest of it right yeah we all
can life happens it happens and you're
gonna work it out you could say I did my
best to be responsible and things do
happen
